Double standard especially when it comes to sex is part of that inequality that hugs you immediately you become old enough to know what inequality means. And you also get to understand that women are judged more harshly than men especially when it comes to sex.

And this standard is not changing, but instead keeps evolving as the society fights to keep it alive.  And research has shown that more men endorse this double standard, and the view of women as being the conservative ones.

It is common to tag a woman as a “hoe” or a “slut” probably because she engages in casual sex, but when it is a man he is a real gee, and is seen as a conqueror. And the terms “slut” and “hoe” are not meant solely for humiliation or shaming a woman’s desires into oblivion, but they also exert a certain kind of control over the women too. These terms try to tame a woman’s sexual appetite, to stifle her.

And you are forced to ask, is there anything like a male ashewo or a male slut? As it seems the s-word is meant only for women. Men may be tagged as dogs, but the attempt to shame them always turns into something positive. It can also be seen as the  reason why the lame attempt at teaching kids about sex is often more directed to girls than to boys, talk of a system that likes to tell women what to do with their bodies.  It seems the bane of the society is the emergence of sexually-liberated women; women who own their bodies and do what they want with it. And that’s why they would cajole, threaten and even beg women to keep their virginity until marriage.

Also, there is this misconception that a woman having sex makes her lose her value. And so it is not surprising to see guys boast about sleeping with a girl or even call a girl cheap because they’ve had sex. I told one guy with this mindset that “cheapness” is never one sided, and that he is cheap too since they slept together. It should really bother guys that they are promoting a narrative where girls turn cheap after sleeping with them, don’t you think it might be you? Maybe your penis has a cheapening effect to it.

And when I think about this double standard rubbish, the only thing that comes to mind is “sheer hypocrisy”. And women, we need to step up to slut-shaming. They call you a slut, a hoe, cheap? Own it! Let’s see what they would shame us with next.